Looking Back, Stepping Forward

Coming back to posting,had a busy month of May participated in two art exhibits both beautifully done. "Dreams on Canvas" hosted by Circle of Care at the Four Seasons Hotel in Westlake. Fiber 2010 West at Studio Channel Islands Art Gallery. As a result of the Studio Channel Islands Show I have become a member and have work in the gallery store. Sitting here today and reflecting on how I am embracing recycling as a theme in my art. The first really recycled piece I created was my credit card purse " Deficit Spending" which I made from credit cards, telephone wire, coins, with a lining of digitally printed fabric. I enjoyed the process and am contemplating another piece as I have a more cards to recycle.

My second recycled piece is called "ReLeaf" and could be worn as a wrap or hung on a wall. This piece was made from recycled sweaters, wool yarn and roving. I am liking this reusing of materials and wanting to do more work.

April 9 Promotion Day New Art Etc.

	Today is a beautiful spring day great for new opportunities and expansion and I am in two art shows opening next weekend. Here are links to the shows: www.dreamsoncanvas.org/featuredartists www.artslant.com/la/events/show/102080-fiber-2010-west
	As part of the show Dreams on Canvas Gala Event on Saturday May 1, 2010 I will also be showing some of my latest work sculptured thread / yarn bowls made from recycled thrums, (thrums are the leftovers from weaving, very generously given to me by one of my handweaver friends, Deborah Jarchow) To attend GALA contact Circle of Care for tickets (818) 817-3288

will i find myself inside

I am feeling like I am locked inside myself and can't get out. I used to be so sure of what I was doing now every moment
is a challenge to just let myself be , to believe and to move forward so slowly.

Transformation

A butterfly is such a wonderful example of death and transformation. In it's short life it moves from egg, to larvae (or caterpillar) which all takes an average of 4 days. As a caterpillar it will eat steadily to store energy in the form of fat and nutrients. Once it has enough stored up, it will go to work on the next stage which is becoming a chrysalis.To do this the caterpillar creates it's own magical transforming chamber, a cocoon, in about two weeks a beautiful, colorful butterfly emerges from that cocoon.

The life span of a butterfly is not long , a matter of weeks but what an amazing life of continuous change. I am wanting to become the butterfly, creating my own cocoon to feed my artful spirit, storing up nutrients thru meditation, movement and self love, and allowing myself to emerge into new beauty as I feel it.

Feeding Myself Art Food

Through all of this change and stretching and moving I am requiring myself to feed myself daily. Not just food but art food, and love, unconditional self love which means even if I am unsure or in doubt I love myself. Even if I feel like a failure or stuck or unmotivated or uninspired I love myself. Art food what does it taste like. Maybe today it tastes like ocean air with a slight salty tang to it, or chocolate melted on my hands inviting me to lick them clean.

Today my art food was dreaming and a walk in the beautiful clear blue sky of a day.

CHANGE is ALL AROUND

CHANGE

That is all I have been hearing, seeing, feeling, and knowing that I am wanting to understand what that means to me. The dictionary says change is "to make the form, nature, content , future course, etc. of (something) different from what it is or from what it would be if left alone:" It means that something has to change in my life, has it ? I lost my mother about 10 weeks ago and I am working thru the grief. Grief is tricky some days you feel completely normal and balanced and other days you feel like putting one foot in front of the other one is all that you can handle. With the loss of my mother I have lost my way, somehow my personal compass cannot seem to find true north. But maybe that is because true north is shifting , the old ways and formulas of doing things seem to be falling apart, so my quest is to find the new way to see my path with the light of love

Sorrow

I feel like I am suffocating in sorrow

led by pain

crying in my dark spaces

feeling alone

I want to breathe freely

raise my head

let out a roar

wanting

to spew out the sorrow

feel the release

even for just a moment